I truly am sorry for my thoughts about your skirt last year. The honest truth is that you looked adorable in it and I was a sweating, hulking mess after BodyVibe while your mascara hadn’t even streaked. So I consoled myself with the thought that at least I hadn’t worn a freaking tennis skirt to class. Only people who don’t take exercise seriously wear skirts to the gym. Or so I thought.

Then, last year, whilst hugely pregnant, I read Kelly’s blog post (Excitement on the Side) about why running skirts are important. And I got it. I realized that while the BodyVibe goddess might have been wearing her skirt for the fashion angle, there was another very good reason behind running skirts: postpartum incontinence.

Now, I’ve been quietly giving myself and my pelvic floor muscles a high five. We squeezed out a 9.5 lbs baby and hadn’t experienced any uncontrollable peeing. No seepage. WOOT! What hadn’t occurred to me is that my gym time has been significantly reduced. And that plays a factor in how well you and your kegels can manage.

Well, I’ve had my come to Jesus moment now. I am thoroughly chastised. Last week, I got off my tuckus and decided to jog for a bit on the treadmills at the gym. I prepared a bottle, got my son into his car seat, dropped him off with the onsite day care, found a happy hardcore mix on YouTube and tuned out. I’ve never been much of a speed demon. With my RA, it’s always hit or miss if my joints will cooperate with the high impact running. But that day was a good day for my ankles and knees, and I just really needed to blow off some steam.

I like to start my jog at 2.5 on the treadmill. Good clip for warming up. Let’s me mess with my cell phone and get the music going. After a couple of minutes I’ll up the speed to 3.2. That’s it, friends. I never really get higher than that. Maybe 3.5 if I want to get crunk. I know, you’re super impressed. So am I.

Anyway, I’m moseying along, grooving to the rhythmic thumping of rave music, and I think, “Man, I should have hit the bathroom first.” But I ignore it and keep the pelvic floor tight. Soon, I have to shift back down to 2.5 (Oh, I also can’t maintain a speed of 3.2 for more than two minutes or so at a stretch, FYI.) I catch my breath, turn the music up a little louder in my ear buds and shift up to 3.2 again. This feels great. I know I’ll be sore and my right foot is doing that thing it used to do when I was training for the Turkey Trot 5K so long ago, but just being at the gym doing SOMETHING makes me feel awesome about myself.

I had completely forgotten about how much I needed to pee earlier. But now that I’m back up to 3.2, the urge is back. When I am at the walking pace, I’m fine. But at a slight jog- I’m on the verge of losing my water! I made it through about two more intervals of running for two minutes at a go, but that was it. After that, it was walking until I hit the 40 minute mark.

Oh cruel fate. I mocked and now I’m in danger of being a mock-ee. I suspect that one day soon, I will reap that which I have sown. It will be a sad day. And so, I’m sorry I laughed at your running skirt BodyVibe goddess. I might be making an investment of my own soon. But first, I’m gonna try these. Got a sample in the mail before I ever had the baby. Now I just need to find them again.